SCENES FROM THE INDIAN ACADEMICA: V

Kalu Sir

I am conducting a practical and the students are busy peering through microscopes when I hear a voice immediately behind me.

`Is this the physics department?’

I turn back. A boy. Clad in denims and a T- shirt, a goggle hanging carelessly through one of the belt-loops, is looking at me.

`No. This is biochemistry.’
`But Kalu sir said this was physics,’ he insists.
`Kalu sir? Who is Kalu sir?’ Now this is perplexing. I have never heard of this teacher. And even if there is one, Kalu is usually a nick name or a diminutive that a student is not expected to know or utter. Well, at least not in front of another teacher.

`Ah…, now, you know, er…., the sweeper that we have…’
`The sweeper!’ Now that makes sense. There is indeed a sweeper by the name of Kalu. But it doesn’t make sense. The boy just now said `sir.’ Now you don’t call a sweeper, ` sir!’ Or do you? I should know better. I have heard, `Shukla sir,’ and Shukla is a lower division clerk. I have heard, `Arun sir,’ and Arun is a laboratory attendant. And that reminds me……

1983. I am a second year PG student . Vinay, a fellow student from microbiology department comes over and whispers, rather confidentially, ` You know Jyoti , that girl in first year? The one who is rather plain and haughty? Well, she must be shown her place!’

`Why? What did she do?’
`She called Ingle an attendant. Just like that. They were doing this experiment, see. Now she needs something, or probably doesn’t quite know how to handle this instrument. So she looks at Ingle and says, “ Hey, attendant! Come here please.” Now is that right ? I mean Ingle is an attendant. OK. But just because he is an attendant, does it give you the right to call him an attendant? I mean, should you , just like that, call him an attendant?’

Yeah. Right. Pithy question. Point to ponder. Do you call an attendant an attendant? If you don’t, then what do you call him?

I Know now. You call him `sir.’ As you would call a peon, `sir.’ As you would call a sweeper, `sir.’ As you have always called a teacher, `sir.’

The teachers don’t like it. There is talk in the staff room and it is clear that they are peeved. But all meaning in the debate is lost the moment they reach this consensus: punish the students, or, it’s moderate variant: tell the students they are doing it wrong, that `sir’ is an epithet reserved for the teachers only. Unknown to them, the students have got it absolutely right. It is the teachers who have got it wrong.

Erudition and knowledge separates teachers from non-teaching employees. This used to be the only pedestal which the teachers could climb and were respectfully called ‘sir’ for this reason. If they are now not interested in climbing this pedestal, or have trained their eyes on some other pedestal, the distinction between them and others withers.

The students are now referring to everyone elder to them and an employee of the college as ‘Sir.’ At least they are oblivious to any other difference between clerks and teachers and, now even between sweepers and teachers. Is there a difference?